Masturbation : Expectation vs Reality

We are all humans and somethings we need a helping hand to release that extra pressure building inside us as it's been a whileeeee . Here is a naughty humor out take of how we masturbate.

Expectation:
What boys Imagine it to be like, how girls masturbate?
Dim light, slow seductive music playing in the background, scented candles lit up, silk and satin bed on which rose petal are spread unevenly creating an ambiance, girl lying in a seductive pose biting her lips ummm teasing herself with the beats of the music thinking about her boyfriend...ooohhh it feels so good yesssss and a longggg orgasm her back arched .. making all boys dream cum true...

Reality:
Are you insane who got all the time in world to gather all the stuff rose, candles Ru kidding me
hell NOOO. In reality I would be lying either on the bed or on the floor(you know why) lights off listening to my favorite orgasm music playlist(yes I got one :p), swapping pics of zac efron, salman, varun hotness alert and yessss yeaahhhhh ummmmm BAMMMM ..... done, over phewww... get up and go back to work B**ch. hehehehe

Reaction to when doing naughty stuff(u know what I am taking about) and heard a knock at the door:
Knock knock knock....
Boys:
1. Mom I am doing my biology practical work.
2. Mom I am in shower , down in a minute
3. Younger Brother enter room without knocking: Ohhhhh shit WTF.. run screaming "mom bro is playing with his
     wee-wee"...gotcha busted :P

    

Girls:
knock knock knock
1. Mom painting my nails 15 minutes don't want to spoil the bed-sheet (double meaning alert lol)
2. Doing yoga, Meditating don't disturb
3. Still not done after 20 min mom enter room eehhhh ... Thank God I was on the floor phewww
4. Most awkward moment when you are on climax looking in the eyes of your Bae Zac Efron and can't even moan scream even when alone at home as the neighbors will have their ears glued on the wall.

After effect of Masturbation:
Boys:
OMG what have I done had a important match in the evening what should I do, What should I do ..hmmm I am so tired going to sleep zzzzzzzzzzz

Girls:
Get up change under dress, comb her hair looking in the mirror all shiny fresh and ready to work and do household chores.
As in the words of Legendary "Samantha Jones" herself "Someone is glowing, did you had an orgasm today heheheee" yeahh

I read somewhere that in Japan it is legal to manufacture Sex toys that looks like penisess... awww I love my rabbit alwayss satisfy me ;)

And last but not the least on average a male orgasm last for 5 sec and female 20 sec..... you go girl
show den how its done yeaaaa paww pawww ....

My playlist to Masturbate: duhhh yess I do have one 

Britney- Breathe on me
Again Britney-Touch of my hand
Ellie Golding-love me like you do

Hope you like my funny, naughty view on masturbation ..... Peace no judging, just simple naughty humor
You know I love you
xoxo